Log in

No account? Create an account

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Lotus82 defines courage for us

On 27 August she insisted that I take this photo so I did. It's almost a month later now because this is the first time I am back in Boston and at my own laptop with my cam here to download it. Didn't trust any of the Israeli computer cafe's and in Palestine I never saw a single one. Cam shops, forget it. I spose if I had made it to Tel Aviv it would have been duck soup to do it in a day, but never got there.


This sucks because it is my first picture post and it has taken thirty minutes to get this far and I have no idea how to rotate and enlarge it for you, all I can do so far is to use the LJ utility code and this is all it will do. The original is far far bigger and right side up. And that's how it started its journey from my screen to here!

I know practically any of you could fix this in ten seconds but LJ will not give me a clue as to how. LJ ate this post twice and my external server broke my connection once.


If any of you want to copy this and fix it and put it into a reply here, please do!!

Anyway, to fill in: she was hit by a car only a couple of blocks from her apartment; she was almost killed by the driver; it was 19 / 20 August; broken R hip / pelvis, broken R shoulder, deep cut on her head requiring stitches, but no lung damage nor brain injury. She was going to be one of my guides in Israel but, of course, we did not quite make that date!

That is a real smile through the pain, and she gave me a lot of those in our time together in the hospital. The blue double-tube in her nose is oxygen and as I recall she is holding a morphine drip trigger in her R hand --- this is a personal control to the tube just out of sight under the patch in the middle of her left arm. What hurt her the most was to try to sit up a little bit and not let her legs get stiff [I asked her if I could help lift and she said no, she needed to try to move her legs on her own, and she slowly did that; she couldn't see either of them, but she did it very well and very painfully.] She joked with me and lightly squabbled with her Mom in Russian. So it is only a few days after the accident here, it's why her eye areas are still so bruised. Her bed is out-of-frame to her R and the person sitting in the chair to her L belongs to the next patient over [the room was a quad.]

She is so alive and real and actually spunky, I hope at least a little of that comes through for you.

I realized I was looking right at the presence of a miracle. I thought so a month ago, and I'm more sure today. When I got to Haifa with Naatz next to me and all those demented Haifa drivers speeding by in front of us, all she had to say was "Lois" and tug my arm so I'd stay safe on the median.

That came in very handy in Frankfurt, Amsterdam, and even Delft. Not to mention New York and Boston! I hear both of them often, each day really, and I'm more careful than I have ever been in my life.

O yeah that is Toby snuggled in her left hand and Toby was her 24 / 7 companion at the time.

I think she will look at this and laugh and comment on how far she has come since 27 August.

She is also one of the people who could fix her pic in seconds lol

Thank you, Lois, for being who you are and sharing all the miracles you are. And thank you Naatz!


( 19 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 26th, 2008 06:00 pm (UTC)

There ya go.

Yes, she's completely amazing. What blew me away -- and still does -- is she WANTED this picture taken; she wanted people to see it and know.
Sep. 26th, 2008 06:10 pm (UTC)
YAY Meow you are a gift!

Yes, I had to ask her twice if she wanted me to take it...she'd started off: "Is that your camera??" When I asked the second time, she got all impatient with me and actually rolled her eyes gave me her best "Can't you understand English?" look !! !!

It is a miracle that she is in my life at all, just like it is a miracle Anna is. [And you.] I long ago stopped trying to figure out why.

But I will NOT stop trying to figure out how to do what youuuu just did. Brad the LJ baby in the canyon.

I kept on trying to leave, thinking, oh fuck I am getting her all tired out, and when I wiggled myself a bit she looked all mournful and asked me why I needed to go so soon. That happened two or three times. Finally John came in and she started sternly lecturing him about taking his medicine because he seemed to be getting the flu.

Sep. 26th, 2008 06:34 pm (UTC)
Yes, Lois is priceless. We are all blessed to know her, and I consider myself very lucky.

And "Meow" (Amy C.) is an inspiration too! :-)
Sep. 26th, 2008 07:00 pm (UTC)
Amy is just simply awesome. Another in the Courage family. We've been writing and possibly I'll get to meet her and her husband before I move overseas...
Sep. 30th, 2008 01:29 am (UTC)
Awwwwww....both of you are so sweet!!!! I'm blushing now...*smile*
Sep. 30th, 2008 01:29 am (UTC)
Thank you so much for this, Ellen. *hugs*
Sep. 30th, 2008 01:28 am (UTC)
Indeed she is, and thanks much for all your kind words! *hugs*
Sep. 28th, 2008 03:01 pm (UTC)
Poor baby!! But, really, all you can see is that lovely smile and spunk in her eye. She really has such a nice "light" about her....if I went through what she went through, I would a) not be smiling and would b) rip the head off anyone who tried to take my picture.

She's incredible, thanks for sharing her with us and I wish her nothing but god speed in her recovery!
Sep. 28th, 2008 04:31 pm (UTC)
Can hardly imagine a more bizarre situation, Mia. I'd never met her in real life before, and I was being mightily poked at by online Friends to go see her in the hospital only a few days after she'd almost been killed. Because there we were, both in Israel. Of course the accident was not on our schedule.

But the Friends wanted me to go and visit and pass on as much info as I could because we had all been freaking out when she suddenly went offline into a long silence. Of course most Friends had also been very close to Kiota and all the same fears came back. In spades.

I asked her husband John for permission and he said okay. Just briefly.

So I very gingerly approach her bed and there she was propped up in her chair brightening up the whole room. Would YOU want a first real-life meeting with an LJ Friend after you'd just almost been permanently squished?

Anyway ten minutes stretched into more than two hours. I guess we were both enthralled with each other, neither of us wanted the meeting to end. She didn't get more tired with me. She got *less* tired!

Her mother left us alone and I immediately freaked out. Where were the call buttons for me to ring for help if she needed it suddenly? "Right here in my hand and you can't have it, you're not going anywhere."

Wow. WowWowWow.

And as Meow pointed out, she ***wanted*** that picture taken. I couldn't believe it. Then or now. But there she was. And, is :P

Cynics will say it was the morphine talking. I don't think so.

She even pushed the sleeve up her R arm because she wanted me to see the wound there: it was a single long strip of adhesive up + down the top of her arm and shoulder. They'd put a couple of pins in, only needed a small incision.

And she talked and talked about what she remembered.

I was trying really hard at first not to wince and not to cringe and to be Bright Brad instead. No doubt my happiness that she was not dead shined right through too. But if anything it was *she* who was helping *me* heal. Totally unbelieveable.

After awhile we got settled with each other, and shared stuff about LJ Friends who were also having one kind or another of a tough time in their lives and whom we both were connected with.

If you saw it on a stage you would boo and walk out. No way anything like this could happen.

Experience of a lifetime. Just like Kiota was. And, is.
Sep. 26th, 2008 06:45 pm (UTC)
I don't know Lois, but that picture does show all the characteristics you tell us she has.

I truly wish her the speediest recovery.
Sep. 26th, 2008 06:58 pm (UTC)
Lois is a very big, intimate, and longtime friend of Anna, they kinda grew up together in Israel, she modeled for a couple of Anna's photos and her Mom gave her some books from Anna's library in her old room at home, afterwards.

Her life was very full of challenges way before the accident, too: read her profile page and you'll see.

She's a TA and a tutor also, so is her husband John; we talked about that as well. She had just finished correcting a bunch of student papers and had handed them back, something like one day or so before the accident.
Sep. 26th, 2008 06:59 pm (UTC)
I wish everyone in the entire world knew Lois personally, it always strikes me as unfair that our small community should keep her to ourselves when there are so many people who need just a little of her in their life. Words and descriptions aren't quite enough (although you've consistently done both splendidly; you've captured Lois to a T in these entries); you need to have real contact with her to understand the magnitude of her beauty.
Sep. 26th, 2008 07:05 pm (UTC)
I quite simply can't say it better than you just did.

Beauty just shines inside of her and through her. It's the presence. From the first moment I walked into her room and both of our eyes got big....if Anna can be everywhere these days, she was right there right then with us, all afternoon. And all of you were too.

Lois' heart is just endlessly wide. There's nobody else like her. We are blessed.

Edited at 2008-09-26 07:06 pm (UTC)
Sep. 26th, 2008 09:29 pm (UTC)
Ow! poor thing.

Yes, her happy core shows through, but somehow that just makes it harder to see what she's dealing with. I hope the driver is learning the error of his ways. I hope she's in less pain now, and healing as quickly as may be.

Sep. 27th, 2008 06:32 am (UTC)
Mari + Alex + everybody: John updated us a bit last Monday [22nd.] Saturday a week ago she was moved to her rehab hospital, the goal is to regain as much use as possible of her R shoulder and R hip before she goes to her parents' home.

Her parents have much more room than their apartment does, it's needed because she still is projected to be in [and out of!] a wheelchair for three + months more. If I remember correctly what she told me, it also has first floor easy access, unlike the apt.

She's also still in a lot of pain, more than anyone would like: med pros, family, us, and Lois herself of course. Most of this is because she took the full force of the front of the car [her two crosswalker companions were treated and released the same day] and there was a whole lot of bone reconstruction required not just on the top of her leg but across her whole pelvic area [that's a complicated bone-structure through there.]

But she's so brave [in addition to everything else.] She's already gone to the edge of a street and loudly re-experienced her panic --- an oncoming car saw her and slowed right down, the natural sequence of things --- so the next time she does that, the panic will be less --- and each day there is a little improvement, some days more than others.

This is all a challenge, a big one, in this new stage of her life filled with them. She's very upfront and direct about her life as she writes on her Profile page ... and it is inspiring just to go there and read her words --- words directed to each person who stops by, ranging from deep dear friends to total strangers. It always inspires me, anyway.

Her heart stayed with Kiota every step of the way, no matter how far apart they were geographically and emotionally. And she is the first responder to Ki's last sad, trapped post from Evergreen last Spring. And what does she talk about? Encouragement to see with new eyes. Living and enduring through tough times as related to labor in childbirth: very tough, very painful, but required as a process of changing and giving birth to a whole new exciting being: very difficult but very beautiful, a new mortal life as a fresh bright new baby.

A metaphor also for what Lois herself is doing right now.

There are but a few people I've met in my life who embody light for me, right down through their core. She is one of them.

Edited at 2008-09-27 06:36 am (UTC)
Sep. 27th, 2008 09:21 am (UTC)
Lois sounds like an amazing person - I don't know her but I hope she's getting better.
Sep. 27th, 2008 11:24 am (UTC)
Yes, part of the long deep friendship with Kiota was that Lois would get all pissed off at her for one thing or another, and tell her so, they'd fight, but Lois kept on staying engaged, in the long run.

And she *is* getting better. Her sharing is far from done.
Sep. 28th, 2008 03:56 pm (UTC)
Thanks for sharing. I'm glad she's doing better.
Sep. 28th, 2008 04:35 pm (UTC)
Oooh Lia. That's two of us. That's many of us!
( 19 comments — Leave a comment )


kiota too late for the stars
Moonfire Marion Bridge / Brad

Latest Month

April 2019
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Naoto Kishi