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ik hoop

....is how you say "I hope" in Dutch.

Anna Frank used it all the time in her journals.
Anna Rosenfeld, seldom. Too seldom.

What turned M. Frank on was this short-wave radio announcement from the exiled government in London. They wanted kids in Holland to keep diaries about their daily life under the occupation because afterwards the gov would compile a historical record out of them. Anna had already been keeping her journal and this encouraged her to revise it. And she decided something else. She would use her journal entries as raw material for a novel. So she set about revising everything like crazy.

What turned M. Rosenfeld on was that she participated in NaNoWriMo --- National Novel-Writing Month --- as many of you have too. She also published her own short stories on the net and / or gave them to friends with requests for revision. She once got all pissy with me because she complained that she wanted constructive criticism from me and not just vanilla approval like "you always send me." I got pissy right back and told her, just fucking send it to me and you'll see what you get. She did, I rewrote most of her ending and jumped in here + there in the earlier passages, always telling her WHY I was composing the critiques I was. And I was sooooo pleased that she incorporated some of my suggestions. She trashed others, of course.

Freiheit! = German for 'freedom'.

I also made a screenplay out of it because it was so darn visual and bloody and deathly and firestorm-y it was obvious that she saw the whole thing in images. Like I do too. She was her own lead character, now that I think of it: black leather everything, very sexy leathers in fact; automatic pistol, crowds dying by the hundreds, lonnnnnnnnnnng personal death scene.

Anna F and Anna R were both teenagers cooped up with roommates they REALLY didn't like, and it was mutual [in the case of some of them, not others]; both were depressed and very scared.

But Anna F wrote "No one is so poor that you can't give a smile to someone that needs it." And she did.
And Anna R did too. Maybe tentative here + there, she had to trust you at least a little.

I am incredibly rich with all the smiles she gave me. Even as she felt herself going through her last days here with us, even as she felt herself disintegrating. I gave them right back to share.

It is said that love is the only thing in the whole world that, when you give it away, you always find you have more inside you to give.

I think that's like hoop also. In any language you want :)

Blessings Be.

It's raining more than rain around here and that is a great blessing too.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Sep. 13th, 2008 09:37 am (UTC)
I find it interesting that you mentioned that particular story-- I read it last night & bawled through the whole thing.

She really was her main characters.
Sep. 13th, 2008 03:15 pm (UTC)

And that's good, Otter, because she put so much of herself into her all creative work --- not just into her journaling. And we still have all of that with us :)
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )


kiota too late for the stars
Moonfire Marion Bridge / Brad

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