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bustopher jones writ large

There is a character in "CATS" named Bustopher Jones. He looks like a penguin and he makes his entrance waddling down the aisles and he is sung about as a 'twenty-five pounder.' "Cats", of course, being the internationally famous musical based on TS Eliot. Who won a playwrighting award even though he didn't write the play and was looking down from heaven all the while.

What do you do if you run a shelter and find this giant pussycat placing her tender parts in your kitty litter pan while the rest of her splays out all over the place?

You call CNN, that's what.

This cute kid weighs 44 pounds [20 kg] and that's as much as a second / third-grade-student in the US. Her face is kinda normal but the rest of her looks like a toffee Titanic. She has Garfield's markings. And she's not afraid of portable TV cams placed on the floor and staring at her, because she's much bigger than them.

She's apparently a stray so she's up for adoption; she apparently hasn't expressed menu preferences yet, because whatever they put down for her needs to be a lot. It is delivered by tractor-trailer.

I imagine when she gets her purr motor going the walls will shake like a California earthquake. Which we have just also had, the other day.

I could probably afford to feed her for awhile but when she jumps in my lap I will need immediate pelvic bone reconstruction.

I would have to give her the house and go outside in the yard to live in the cathouse.

Wait, that doesn't sound right .....

Maybe I'll take her to Israel with me. She'll hiss at customs and I won't have any problem. I can hide behind her when the Intifada comes back again.

Come to think of it, maybe I'll get her to run for President of Israel. I see there's to be a vacancy. She would doubtless do a better job than Olmert and I would get diplomatic immunity and I bet I could get my own armoured Cat to drive, too. Pointed East.

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
naatz
Jul. 31st, 2008 12:16 pm (UTC)
There's this slight problem - Olmert isn't Israel's president.

|Meduza|
silverplate88
Jul. 31st, 2008 12:29 pm (UTC)
Hey, Neta! ... well, whatever he is, he's some kind of crook and he won't be there much longer, right? Or so it's being reported over here. Who *is* the president?

I'm curious about who runs the IDF. I could go google it but you could tell me personally! Over here Bush is head of everything. There's another crook. Starting with the national elections he stole and the mess he made when he was governor of Texas.
naatz
Jul. 31st, 2008 08:58 pm (UTC)
Olmert is Prime Minister!

Our President is one Shim'on Peres. Nobody really knows what the President does.

Head of the Military is Gabbi Ashkenazi, and he's under the Minister for Defence Ehud Barak {ex Prime Minister}.

|Meduza|
silverplate88
Aug. 1st, 2008 10:25 am (UTC)
O Neta thank you. I have to learn all this stuff so when I get there I can discuss international politics without sounding like a typical American dork. Just an atypical one.

Nobody knows what *our* Vice-President does, either. Except steal money and make gazillions from the Iraq war since it's all his civilian companies getting the reconstruction contracts. Sweet deal: our president blows up stuff over there and our vice-pres gets rich rebuilding it. So the pres can blow it up again ....

Your dude that I miss is Ariel Sharon. Don't know how he went down at home but over here his nick was "The Bulldozer" because he was as big as one; and, that time he went over to ... The Dome of the Rock? ... with half the IDF around him, to ... uhm ... worhsip? He got a big number of Palestinian panties all bunched in a wad and I thought that was amusing. Hey, it's his country, right?

And, of course, Moshe Dayan. YAY.
lotus82
Jul. 31st, 2008 05:23 pm (UTC)
John showed me the CNN article this morning. Also the MSNBC one. There's also a YouTube video out there. That's some fat cat! And here we thought our outdoor cat, Tuches, is a fat cow =)
elvenforever
Jul. 31st, 2008 11:01 pm (UTC)
Link, please!!!
silverplate88
Aug. 1st, 2008 10:15 am (UTC)
the one I found first is http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/25937546/

Her temporary name is Princess Chunk and she would be a perfect assistant Queen for Miss Meow [at your house, the one with two legs and the one with four.]

I would zoom down to NJ myself and let her adopt me except that my insurance premiums for catastrophe would go through the roof. Not for her, for me. When she decides to occupy my lap. But I already wrote about that.

Instead, I'm thinking I'll go occupy some farm in Tel Aviv to get enough space, fly us over there, and Lotus82 and John can come visit and teach both of us Russian, Hebrew, and Survival 101.
(Deleted comment)
silverplate88
Aug. 3rd, 2008 04:52 pm (UTC)
Me too. That's why, when we get over there, I'll hitch her up to a plow so she can dig furrows for when we plant flower bushes and olive trees. Excercise will shrink her.

Come to think of it, I'll be beside her. My rainbow belt could stand a little less wear at the end of it, too!
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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