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Air-otica /2 here come the snacks

Take off with us
Take off with us
We're warmin' up, so take off with us:
NY to LA, goin' all the way,
Won't you climb aboard, you'll ride as smooth as glass...

Meet our friendly, eager crew:
They only live to service you,
Service, service, service ...
This flight comes complete
With your choice of seat,
And any seat you grab will be first class...

Up there where the clouds are billowing,
You're as close to heaven as you'll ever be:
Lean back, relax, here come the snacks!
Drop your diet, have a ball,
Don't stop, don't stop, don't stop with one:
Try 'em all!

Music's ready to begin,
Take out your headsets, plug 'em in,
What's your answer, chum?
Are you gonna cum
On the coolest, hottest, coolest, hottest, coolest, hottest
Trip that's ever been?
Lean Back! Relax!

[applause follows tableau]

Joe: Thanks, but it's not exactly over yet ...
SM [runs about with smokepot]: Smoke, smoke, smoke!!
Joe: The lights go down, and a light comes up over there:
Dancer [underlighted face]: Welcome. Welcome aboard Air-Otica.
Cast: Take off with us ...[costumes start coming off]
Dancer: Flying not only coast to coast, but anywhere your desires and fantasies wish to take you.
Dancer: Let us all get to know one another: [Dancers introduce selves to partners]
Dancer: Remember, we can take you anywhere.

Producer 1: They're taking their clothes off!
Producer 2: Mm. MmMm.

Dancer: Just reach out your hand and ... introduce yourselves: [Dancers repeat intros]

Producer 1: O, O, I think we just lost the family audience...

Dancer [excitedly]: And don't forget about our Group Fun, Fun, Fun Plan!
Composer [buries face in hands]: Now Sinatra will never record it.

[Erotic dances continue to climax in poly groupings]

......

Producer 1 [whispers]: I hate to hurt his feelings, but we can't have that on a stage!
Joe: Well?
Producer 1: Well...erm...it's interesting!
Producer 2: Very interesting.
Joe: Yeah, but didja LIKE it?
Producer 1: It's very unusual ....

Joe: Oooooo, I don't think they liked it. What do you think?
Audrey [ex-wife]: I don't know about the audiences, but I think it's the best work you've ever done....you son-of-a-bitch!

Composer: Jesus Christ, sex, sex, sex: can't he ever think of anything else but sex?
Producer 2 [sprays his mouth with aerosol]: It's a sickness.

Joe [to Death]: Nothin' I ever do is good enough. It's not beautiful enough, it's not funny enough, it's not deep enough, it's not ANYTHING enough. Now, when I see a rose, that's perfect, that's perfect. I wanna look up to God and say 'How the hell did you do THAT? And why the hell can't I do that?'

Death: You know, that's probably one of your better con lines!

Joe: Yeah, that is! But that doesn't mean I don't mean it!

========================
excerpted from the screenplay --
:Bob Fosse and Robert Allan Aurthur, "All That Jazz" (c) 1979

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